Thursday, March 24, 2011

Below is lesson you can say which I have learn't from my nana ji. He passed away on 14th March 2011.

We Miss a Lot Nana ji.

Years ago I went to Nana ji (Grand Paa) for help. I said, "Nana ji , how is it that you've accomplished so much in your life? You're still full of energy, and I'm already tired of struggling. How can I get that same enthusiasm that you've got?"

Nana ji didn't know what to say to me then. But he figure that he owe me an answer. So here is what he believe and taught me at different stages.

He think a lot of it has to do with how a person looks at things. He call it 'keeping your eyes wide open.'

First, realize that life is filled with surprises, but many are good ones. If you don't keep watching for them, you'll miss half the excitement. Expect to be thrilled once in a while, and you will be.

When you meet up with challenges, welcome them. They'll leave you wiser, stronger, and more capable than you were the day before. When you make a mistake, be grateful for the things it taught you. Resolve to use that lesson to help you reach your goals.

And always follow the rules. Even the little ones. When you follow the rules, life works. If you think you ever really get by with breaking the rules, you're only fooling yourself.

It's also important to decide exactly what you want. Then keep your mind focused on it, and be prepared to receive it.

But be ready to end up in some new places too. As you grow with the years, you'll be given bigger shoes to fill. So be ready for endings as well as challenging beginnings.

Sometimes we have to be brave enough to move from the familiar to the unfamiliar. Life isn't just reaching peaks. Part of it is moving from one peak to the next. If you rest too long in between, you might be tempted to quit. Leave the past in the past. Climb the next mountain and enjoy the view.

Dump things that weigh you down emotionally and spiritually. When an old resentment, belief, or attitude becomes heavy, lighten your load. Shed those hurtful attitudes that slow you down and drain your energy.

Remember that your choices will create your successes and your failures. So consider all the pathways ahead, and decide which ones to follow. Then believe in yourself, get up, and get going.

And be sure to take breaks once in a while. They'll give you a renewed commitment to your dreams and a cheerful, healthy perception of the things that matter the most to you.

Most important of all, never give up on yourself. The person that ends up a winner is the one who resolves to win. Give life everything you've got, and life will give its best back to you.

Thank You So Much Nana Ji for teaching us such great lessons in life. Your life is truly a path where we all want to walk again and again.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

I was talking with a friend a few days ago, who is pregnant with her first child. We were talking about parenting - how our parents raised us, what we would do differently with our children, what we would keep the same. She was a little apprehensive, a little anxious about being a parent, about being responsible for a child and his or her life.

I remember saying to her, that regardless of how perfectly she may try to raise her child, the child will be screwed up anyway (yes, those were the exact words I used) simply by his or her own interpretation and association of everything that happens in his or her life.

Haven't we all - at some point in our lives - made conclusions and generalisations about something based on one incident alone, and believed that to be true for all cases?

Besides, what makes perfect parenting anyway?

I told her a story that I heard at one of Tony Robbins' events. A story about two Vietnam war veterans who had lost their friends and fellow soldiers in the Vietnam war. Both fought in the same war, both witnessed the loss of their fellow countrymen, both experienced the gruesome act of taking someone else's life. And yet, after the war was over, both led very different lives. 30 years since the war ended, one was depressed, lonely and suicidal; the other happy and healthy, surrounded by a loving family and close friends.

So, what was the difference?

Based on his experience of the war in Vietnam, one man thought, "What is the point of being close to someone? I'll lose them anyway." So he lived his life in bitterness and resentment, fearful of being close to anyone to avoid having to feel the pain of losing them.

The other man, on the other hand, thought, "Life is precious. I have to live it to the fullest and cherish every moment of it." So he lived his life in gratitude, treasuring every moment he has with his loved ones. What a big difference that made.

As I am writing this, I am reminded of a talk given by Mr. Beadsworth, a mathematics teacher during my Cambridge A Levels days. I am reminded of his famous ‘Rainbow Talk', in which he talks, literally, about rainbows.

That talk was held in the auditorium of my old college some 11 years ago, but my most vivid memory of it was when he said, "You and your friend might think you are looking at the same rainbow, but you're not, you are looking at two different rainbows." There is a scientific explanation behind that, of course, but when I think about it now - frequency of light and spectrum aside - it is true that two people may be looking at the same rainbow, and still see them differently.

Nothing has meaning except the meaning you give it. You are responsible for giving meaning to everything that has happened in your life. So, the question is, would you rather be like the first war veteran who lived his life with bitterness, resentment and fear? Or would you rather be like the second, who saw the lessons the war had taught him and created a more empowering meaning for it?

Either way, the good news is that, with awareness, you now have the choice of going back to any incident in your past that may be the source of your pain or suffering now, and create a new, more empowering meaning for it. And if you are a parent, perhaps the greatest gift you can give to your child is that, and also the awareness that they too, can look at their rainbows and make them mean something beautiful and special.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I Wish You Enough

Recently I overheard a Father and daughter in their last moments together at the airport. They had announced the departure. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the Father said, 'I love you, and I wish you enough.'

The daughter replied, 'Dad, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Dad.' They kissed and the daughter left.

The Father walked over to the window where I was seated. Standing there I could see he wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on his privacy, but he welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?" "Yes, I have," I replied. "Forgive me for asking, but why is this a forever good-bye?" ."I am old, and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is - the next trip back will be for my funeral," he said. "When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, 'I wish you enough.' May I ask what that means?'"

He began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." He paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail, and he smiled even more. "When we said, 'I wish you enough, we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them." Then turning toward me, he shared the following as if he were reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough "Hello's" to get you through the final "Goodbye."
They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them; but then an entire life to forget them. Remember to tell your family and friends that you wish them enough!

To all of you reading this, I wish you enough.

Sharks in Your Life

The Japanese have always loved fresh fish. But the waters close to Japan have not held many fish for decades. So the fishermen had to go further out to sea to catch their supply of fish, the fishing boats got bigger and bigger. The farther the fishermen went, the longer it took to bring in the fish. If the return trip took more than a few days, the fish were not fresh and they lost their fresh taste.

To solve this problem, fishing companies installed freezers on their boats. They would catch the fish and freeze them at sea. Freezers allowed the boats to go farther and stay longer. However, the Japanese could taste the difference between fresh and frozen and they did not like frozen fish.

Also, the frozen fish brought a lower price. So fishing companies installed fish tanks. They would catch the fish and stuff them in the tanks, fin to fin. After a little thrashing around, the fish stopped moving. They were tired and dull, but alive. Unfortunately, the Japanese could still taste the difference; because the fish did not move for days, they lost their fresh-fish taste. The Japanese preferred the lively taste of fresh fish, not sluggish fish.

So how did Japanese fishing companies solve this problem? How do they get fresh-tasting fish to Japan? To keep the fish tasting fresh, the Japanese fishing companies added a small shark to the tanks that the fish were kept in. The shark of course eats a few fish, but most of the fish arrive in a very lively state due to the fact that the fish are challenged.

Moral of the story:
Some of us are also living like fish that have been caught, we give in too easily, and we are not challenged. Some of us could use a Shark in our life. Consider new challenges and problems in your life as a shark - the challenges and problems can keep us motivated and moving forward. Without challenges we can become complacent, find life boring, and become inactive.

Have a Great Life

I have written about many different people I have met. And I do meet lots of people. We have a small shop at the Cruise Terminal in Saint John. Depending on the size of the ship docking in Saint John, we see 2,000 to 4,000 people in one day.

We meet some of the most interesting people. Last week I was fortunate to me an older woman with a very sunny disposition. We had a discussion about many different things; she was one of those people who you would want to be your grandmother. When she was leaving our shop, I said to her "Have a great day". She looked up at me from her wheelchair and said, "No, have a great life!"

Her words made me smile and I said to her, "You are right". To which she replied, "Yes it is not just today that it is great, it is life that is great, so enjoy it all!"

The next day I was reading a book by William Arthur Ward and came across these words of wisdom he had written many years ago but that still apply today.


Regardless of age, you are still young at heart as long as you exclaim
"Wow" instead of "What's the use!" ….
when you say "Hot dog" instead of "Oh well"….
when you yell, "Yippee" instead of "So what?"….
when you contend "Everyone's important" instead of "You can't fight City Hall"….
When you insist "Folks are swell" instead of "You can't trust people anymore"….
When you greet others with "What a great day to be alive!" instead of "The world is shot to pieces"….
When you proclaim "What an opportunity" instead of "What a predicament."

"Enjoy your life, not just the day!"

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